before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
