Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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