SEEEEXXX PLEASE
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
