NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Randomize
