did you get engaged???
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
