I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
