its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
