Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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