My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I intend to get homeless drunk
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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