I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
