Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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