you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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