I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize