I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I'm really busy with my period
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