xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
