This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
