I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
