yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
