Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
