I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
