I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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