Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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