The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
