My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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