im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
