She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
