Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize