fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Randomize
