Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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