At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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