i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Randomize
