all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
