Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
she smelled like a LAN party
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
