I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Randomize
