saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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