I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
