well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize