His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
