then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
How's work?
Spinning.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
