that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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