ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize
