is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize