WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
