Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Found the puke drawer
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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