Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
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