I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
