Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize