I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
