I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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