I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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